Saw it in 2D today, my second time seeing it in a cinema in as many years. Looked a little DNR-y compared to the 2011 digital cinema version
Things I learned from Jurassic Park:-- When executing a fragrantly illegal, high-risk corporate heist, don't bother to cover your tracks. In fact, make it as blatantly obvious as possible and leave a clearly marked trail of evidence linking you to the crime: a taunting hacker screen, a complete shut down of the island. Hell, when stealing the priceless dinosaur embryos, don't bother to replace them with dummy capsules -- you want them to obviously have been stolen. After all, your ultimate goal is to get sent to prison and have an investigation launched against your new corporate benefactor as soon as possible.
-- A Tyrannosaurus has just broken through a fence and is hunting right next to the car you are otherwise safely protected in. The obvious thing to do is to dig through the car for no reason, find a high-powered flashlight, turn it on, and then wave it around crazily to attract the dinosaur. When it comes over to investigate, shine the light directly into its eyeball. Then, when you can't turn it off (but could turn it on?), don't just put it under the seat or something, make sure you wave it around some more so that a tense attack sequence can occur.
-- T-Rex's visual sense is based on movement. Don't ask questions, Dr. Grant said it so obviously it's true. Not only that, though, but their sense of smell is also probably based on movement, too, because they can get so close to you that their breath can knock your hat off without them detecting your presence.
-- But don't think that T-Rex is completely lame just yet -- he can fly. Or at least levitate, considering his pen is actually a deep, abyssal drop as far as the eye can see in both directions. Raptors can also levitate -- one proudly shoves its head up through a ten foot ceiling grate as our characters kick away at it, but has to take a flying leap after its fallen just to miss a leg dangling above it.
-- After you have plummeted down that drop where the T-Rex magically tore his way through, do not stay put -- that would be the sane, rational thing to do. After all, Laura Dern and that hunter guy are on their way to rescue you. No, go for a midnight stroll through the dinosaur infested woods and put yourself both in harms way and out of reach of rescue.
-- If you are a thirteen year old girl who is also a hacker, conveniently state this fact in the most awkwardly transparent way possible to telegraph to the audience that your skills will come in handy later.
-- When engineering dinosaurs so that they are all females and don't breed, do not bother to look into the very specific species of sex changing amphibian you use to fill the gene sequence gaps.
-- When outfitting the security for your dinosaur-surrounded compound on an island prone to hurricanes and power outages, make sure all your door locks are electric, and under no condition should you allow for manual locking. That would be practical.
-- When a velociraptor is trying to get through the door to eat you, and your thirteen year old hacker sister is navigating a ludicrous computer interface that controls the whole park with relative speed and ease, you should just dance around with your hands on your head. Laura Dern is over in the corner trying to reach a gun -- DO NOT HELP HER. She won't think to ask anyway.
But then again, as Laura Dern herself says in the film, "You can't think through this one. You have to feel it." Yes, this is a typical David Koepp Idiot Plot, but it's directed with so much muscular craftsmanship and is filled with such wonderful performances, all capped with a magisterial John Williams score, that you don't really care. The visual effects, barring the CGI brachiosaur scenes, have aged beautifully, and Stan Winston's animatronics are so real you don't even bother to roll your eyes over the shocking paleontological research failures. The best scene in the film is still one of its most simple: the group comes across a sick triceratops lying in a field, and Sam Neill rests his head on her heaving flank in absolute wonder.
8/10
