Prometheus Fan Reviews

[Kimarhi]

**My Review of Prometheus**



Prometheus is a movie that may or may not be completely unwatchable.
Depending on how personally you take the insult to your intelligence and good taste.

There is no plot.

(Arbitrary things happening spoilers ahead.)


Allegedly the impetus for the narrative is Peter Weyland searching for immortality,
maybe.
But which only manifest itself as him pretending to be dead for no reason. Bringing a ship full of incompetents that proceed to endanger any attempt at any coherent mission. Including a self aware and unpredictable manchild android who he instructs to infect the crew of the ship that he's on with unknown probably toxic alien sewage out of a jar.
Despite the android manchild allegedly speaking alien by studying primitive dialects... with rosetta stone. He's an early unpredictable prototype without a USB port. But he doesn't apparently read the writing on the jar or further investigate the structure where he found it (craftily sneaking a 3 foot alien jug anto the ship in the back of a truck with 4 other people without anybody noticing) for clues to its use or contents.

Or it may allegedly be about Elizibeth Shaw choosing to believe something? Maybe she's a Christian since she trots around wearing a crucifix, but a Christian would not get on a space ship and try to meet god. That contradicts having faith...

Anywho,
plotlessly they proceed to wander back and forth from an apple store standard issue chrome and neon spaceship from star trek to 2-3 large sets ripped off from Giger that dont really serve any apparent plot point other then to look at them. Where absurd things like taking off their helmets, freaking out and getting lost and petting hissing space cobras happen for no apparent plot function other then to die via blender editing.

Until after ripping off dialogue and visuals from 2001, Alien, Aliens, Jodorosky's Dune and every creative movie he's seen before where other people have already done the work and put in the effort to be creative,
damon lindelof basically rips off the end of alien where Ripley tricks and ejects the alien out of the airlock.
But in his clever twist 4 foot 5 pretty girl Shaw tricks a 7-8 foot murderous space karate expert into wrasslin with her across the floor and next to a button that she no-look hits behind her while delivering an action movie punchline which lets a giant octopus through the door to fight with the muscleman.
(His DNA is 100% human from space.)

She then flies off backwards with another decapitated android in a third derelict, implying that the prongs of the derelict from Alien are not majestically pointing skywards, but that its stuck in the dirt face first with its feet in the air, leaving a recorded message for who knows.

But wait theres more!

The octopus has impregnated the apparently already dead karateguy and a soul crushingly laughable dime store Alien knockoff with a conehead pops out.

But as previously suggested at the beginning of this review,
prometheus may arguably have attributes.

I've heard that it has great visuals.
And indeed the Giger knockoffs are generally nice looking Giger knockoffs.

The derilect/juggernaut is nice looking.
The Juggernaut cockpit set is nice looking.

The creature design isn't good,
the costumes look like glorified scuba gear,
the ship looks like any number of shiny generic CGI spaceships.

I've heard that Fassbender performance is impressive.
But its hard to really say when he's saying and doing dumb things.

He just seems like he's talking and acting all mellowed out like he's been smoking pot,
possibly becasue they also brought pot, a full bar, bmx bicycles, a basketball court, chandeliers, a grand piano and a pool table on the scientific mission.

But I'm glad I saw it at least once.
(I've actually studied it multiple times searching for closure.)

It has at the very least released me from ever expecting a return to form from Ridley Scott.
And a new perspective on just what he actually ever brought or had to offer,
even to his greatest achievements.

Spot on sir.

[RobThom]

@ Kimarhi,
Thank you.

An interesting parallel that just occurred to me is that they also had Pool tables, videogames, etc in JC's The Thing.

Although in this example from prom I dont think lindelof was ripping off(/"homage") The Thing again as much as framing everything into his spoiled college experience.
(Considering other clues from his script like "many unknown people pass by who you dont need to know their names".)

But it still doesn't make much sense.

The crew of The Thing where a long term outpost studying platonic and ice movement on earth.
Bringing along a few time killers/boredom outlets made sense.

They weren't on a mission to an unknown environment in search of unknown Alien intelligence and/or dangers, allegedly under the hurried duress of the last moments of Weylands life.

It just doesn't fit.

Looked kinda cool,
but the problem with a lot of modern film making IMO is looking cool before logic or coherence.

Anyway,
prom is designed for and found an audience.

But I dont think its the same audience that truly appreciates what made Alien great.

prom is a movie for teenagers of all ages,
Alien was a movie for adults of all ages.

[Gash]

Why wouldn't a top of the range Weyland Industries ship have recreational facilities and a luxury apartment. It's safe to assume it wasn't constructed purely for the LV-223 mission. Not seeing the problem. Also not seeing how it's generic and shiny in a Star Trek mould when it clearly evokes elements of A deck Nostromo. Are you blaming Scott for being ripped off by sci-fi directors and production designers since ALIEN - that he should have the audacity to look back at everything he gathered for the Leviathan of  A  L  I  E  N  and connect it?

Yeah, what a bastard.

[Kimarhi]

I don't have any problems with the designs of the ship.  That far in the future space travel will become like traveling between continents is now.  You start with ships barely able to protect you from the elements, and you end up with luxury ocean liners.

My problem is with the crew.  And the fact that they are so stupid.  The ONLY reason they do anything is to further the plot in the most base and direct way.

Genius handpicked scientist...............thinks its a good idea to poke at an alien creature with his hand.  Despite its attempted grandeur at answering age old questions its characters follow slasher movie logic.  Its disappointing. 

I wouldn't hate it if it WASN'T tied in with the Alien series.  But it is, and my dislike is pretty strong.

[Gash]

What makes you assume that the crew are hand-picked genii? From the little dialogue that Fifield offered during breakfast aboard the Prometheus he was there to earn money. Given Weyland's motivations I assumed that he had funded Shaw's mission and populated it with a crew that weren't much more than has-beens and drop-outs. He was putting his trust in David doing all the necessary work to get him the meeting he wanted with the 'Engineers'. What did he care for Shaw's mission beyond having her there to help David? The rest of the crew were really just for show as regards Shaw and Holloway and their abilities were not essential - not to Weyland, so not worth paying for. They were less of a problem for him if their main motivation was money.

Maybe it could have been made clearer, but I never got the sense that anyone on board the ship was really sought for their expertise - which is why the film focused on the David, and the dynamics between him Vickers, Shaw and Holloway.

My take on it anyway.

[Kimarhi]

It doesn't matter if they were handpicked or not.  What matters is that for scientist they were idiots.  They should have common sense with or without Weyland's use for them in the plot. 

[Gash]

History is littered with scientists and explorers who did idiotic things.

[ChrisPachi]

I agree, being scientists doesn't exclude them from being clumsy, absent minded or dickheads, it was just kind of ridiculous having so many clumsy, absent minded dickhead scientists in the one place. IMO you can't really transpose the 'idiot college kids in the woods' trope onto 'experts in their respective fields' and expect it to go unnoticed in a film that takes itself so seriously.

[SiL]

History is littered with scientists and explorers who did idiotic things.

It's also littered with scientists who show themselves to be the least bit competent at what they do.

[Gash]

Well obviously, but a ship full of competent scientists rather than money orientated drop-outs would have made things all the more complex for David so why would Weyland want that?

[Kimarhi]

Your assuming your theory on David and the rest of the scientist is correct.

[SM]

The original intention was that they were leaders in their respective fields.

[The1PerfectOrganism]

There's really no excuse for Milburn's stupidity in the theatrical release, unfortunately the excuse is in a deleted scene lol.

Holloway is just arrogant.

I agree, being scientists doesn't exclude them from being clumsy, absent minded or dickheads, it was just kind of ridiculous having so many clumsy, absent minded dickhead scientists in the one place. IMO you can't really transpose the 'idiot college kids in the woods' trope onto 'experts in their respective fields' and expect it to go unnoticed in a film that takes itself so seriously.

There were really only two people who did idiotic things in the whole film I'd argue, Milburn and Holloway.
You could argue Fifield as well but it was clear he just flat out didn't know what he was getting into.
"I like rocks, I love rocks!", this reinforced by "It's a corporate run, they ain't tellin' us shit." gives credence to the theory that only the higher-ups (Elizabeth Shaw, Meredith Vickers, Peter Weyland and David Eight) knew what was going on before the presentation aboard the Prometheus.

prom is a movie for teenagers of all ages,
Alien was a movie for adults of all ages.

Don't catagorize like that.

Lawrence Of Arabia is my favourite film of all time, does the fact I like Prometheus mean I don't understand what makes a great film? When I watch all the Special Features etc to learn more about it.

You can't always look at a film as purely a success or failure.
For instance art is always subjective, I was quite proud of a piece I did at fifteen YRS of the Alien Derelict (Before Prometheus was released mind you.) however now I can look at it and say "That's crap." because of my new outlook with age.

Who's to say that if the majority of the human race live past say.. 120 in the future that they'll have a outlook that says "The Mona Lisa is crap, we can do better." Just like childhood to adulthood to elderly age?

Art is subjective, you can't group it all or judge it all on the same basis.

[ChrisPachi]

Art is subjective, you can't group it all or judge it all on the same basis.

There is an objective way of judging art works within specific art mediums: An oil painting, regardless of whether you like it or not, can be considered well executed or not well executed; there is a technique involved, and the quality of the work is directly affected by the skillful (or un-skillful) application of that technique. How much that affects your enjoyment of the work is individual, but not all criticisms leveled at art are purely subjective.

[UFO-Man]

Rewatched Prometheus for only the third time, really tried my hardest to find something redeeming about it but I couldn't, gorgeous cinematography and effects aside, it's still horrendous

I can never take AVPGalaxy seriously these days, The Alien Fanbase will always have rotten people that act like cry babies over a movie.

I've had better Justice on a Lord of the Rings forum.

This forum keeps proving my point, No wonder outsider don't take this forum seriously .