In The News

[ShadowPred]

http://www.usatoday.com/story/news/world/2013/04/11/newser-beaver-kills-man/2074145/?kjnd=wxtV80akV5h9%2Bt5OZ%2FoDgyYS3ehLgy5%2FiUS%2B%2FEoBphr4IhEnWoi%2Bh%2FbzQW7bOqCv-ea276430-56da-46c3-b7d6-576e3a01caad_ooe9H8FOdxRRWL8idqivBf5MbNmkGX3B2kAdtds5PTAVGh5vWyfWeIUNPpq8ECuz

Man tries to take photo of beaver; it kills him

[BANE]

 
If you get killed by a beaver you're pretty much useless as a creature.

[maledoro]

If you get killed by a beaver you're pretty much useless as a creature.

I've heard of guys killing for some beaver...

[Cvalda]

Damn, I was just about to make that double entendre.

[DoomRulz]

http://www.usatoday.com/story/news/world/2013/04/11/newser-beaver-kills-man/2074145/?kjnd=wxtV80akV5h9%2Bt5OZ%2FoDgyYS3ehLgy5%2FiUS%2B%2FEoBphr4IhEnWoi%2Bh%2FbzQW7bOqCv-ea276430-56da-46c3-b7d6-576e3a01caad_ooe9H8FOdxRRWL8idqivBf5MbNmkGX3B2kAdtds5PTAVGh5vWyfWeIUNPpq8ECuz

Man tries to take photo of beaver; it kills him

Well I guess we can't all be like Steve Irwin. The real kicker here though is,

In similar news with a happier ending, the AFP reports that a Komodo dragon "sunk its teeth into" an 83-year-old Indonesian woman on Tuesday -- but she was able to fend it off.

[Cvalda]

Unfortunately, their bites are venomous.

[DoomRulz]

Indeed, but in relation to the other story, it's still pretty amusing.

[Crazy Rich]

If you get killed by a beaver you're pretty much useless as a creature.

I wouldn't underestimate beavers...

One whack of the tail and a guy had to have one of his balls surgically removed because it was pulverized by the beaver's tail, it was also rabid. I think when a beaver kills, which is rare, it's a good guess they are/were rabid.

Rabid because a normal typical beaver is shy and timid and restrains itself from attack unless you are perceived as a great enough threat or are too close to the den.

[Vertigo]

One whack of the tail and a guy had to have one of his balls surgically removed because it was pulverized by the beaver's tail, it was also rabid. I think when a beaver kills, which is rare, it's a good guess they are/were rabid.

Rabid because a normal typical beaver is shy and timid and restrains itself from attack unless you are perceived as a great enough threat or are too close to the den.

Or if it thinks you'll try to sell its picture to Perez Hilton.

[DoomRulz]

If you get killed by a beaver you're pretty much useless as a creature.

I wouldn't underestimate beavers...

One whack of the tail and a guy had to have one of his balls surgically removed because it was pulverized by the beaver's tail, it was also rabid. I think when a beaver kills, which is rare, it's a good guess they are/were rabid.

Rabid because a normal typical beaver is shy and timid and restrains itself from attack unless you are perceived as a great enough threat or are too close to the den.

Surely a person can outrun it at least?

[BANE]

Or, you know, defend themselves in a manner fitting the fact that you're about 20 times its size.

Kicking it maybe. With your shoe covered, therefore protected foot.

[DoomRulz]

Unless you're wearing steel toes, I don't recommend doing that. I'm sure they could bite through it.

[BANE]

Not if it's flying quickly through the air to punt them across the road.

[Crazy Rich]

If you get killed by a beaver you're pretty much useless as a creature.

I wouldn't underestimate beavers...

One whack of the tail and a guy had to have one of his balls surgically removed because it was pulverized by the beaver's tail, it was also rabid. I think when a beaver kills, which is rare, it's a good guess they are/were rabid.

Rabid because a normal typical beaver is shy and timid and restrains itself from attack unless you are perceived as a great enough threat or are too close to the den.

Surely a person can outrun it at least?

I actually don't know that one. I could ask on Tuesday if I remember. But I just looked at the article and it was hostile enough to severe an artery, which makes it likely it was motivated by being rabid (being normally timid and shy), and the blood flow wouldn't stop. These things all together and that would f**k up just about anyone, if a wound like that doesn't end up killing you the rabies virus could as rabies can be deadly. Which is why I'm not allowed into third semester of college in September until my blood work is confirmed for good enough rabies vaccination level, in my line of education you'll never know if you'll come across the virus.

[Gate]

Even Kim Jong-un thinks windows 8 is a piece of shit