Forgot to mention it, but last weekend I was at a house party and a mate knocked my iPhone into a sink full of water. Took it to Carphone Warehouse and they told me it's still under warranty, but guess what? Water damage isn't covered. They now want £270 for an upgrade, or I have to try and get it repaired somewhere else.
They did at least give me a loan phone in the mean time... The single most hopeless pace of shit I've ever tried to use. It's the smartphone equivalent of that loaner car they give Jim Carrey in The Mask.