How do I get a two and a half hour Alien fan film done. Legally

[AIFF]

I know this is a rather ridiculous thing to ask but I'll continue. Basically I have this idea about making a full feature length Alien fan film. Not 8 or 11 minutes long but 2 and a half hours.With the same kind of practical sfx you would see in the early 80's i.e. Lots of well filmed miniatures and animatroncs (V little CGI) I'm working on the script and I'm putting together some kind of business plan to make it viable to investors without annoying Fox (in theory).  The story is a revision on Weyland Yutani, the Alien and the heroine will be quite familiar to you all already but at the same time it's a complete revision of her character (well.. mostly)   All suggestions welcome.

[Nightmare Asylum]

Honestly, your best bet would be to rewrite it as something original and remove all references to Alien, Weyland-Yutani, etc.

[SiL]

"You don't" is the only answer.

This thing would cost millions of dollars. Fox would notice. Fox would not be happy. No-one would invest in it.

[SM]

What NA and SiL said.

Practical effects are expensive for starters, before you explore costumes, sets, props, lights, camera equipment, makeup, feeding your cast and crew, etc. etc.

[OpenMaw]

IF you pay for it yourself, and attempt to make a profit, they might not try to kill you in your sleep.

[SM]

If you try to make any money - even to cover costs - they're lawyers will likely be in touch.

[SiL]

their*

Seriously, if you think you have a chance of raising the funds for a 2.5 hr creature feature, write it as something new and get it made.

[OpenMaw]

If you try to make any money - even to cover costs - they're lawyers will likely be in touch.

I meant to say "not make a profit" but somehow the most important word got left out.  Oops.

[SM]

their*

*their

Also, get f**ked.

[SiL]

I'm trying

[SM]

Try harder...

[tavianini19]

XD this thread just took a hilarious turn

But yeah, the best bet would be to hypothetically revise it so it's not an alien film, but rather an original sci fi film