It's important to keep in mind just how immortal and awe-inspiring 'Wolf', our friendly anti-hero Predator, truly can be.
While the film will apparently spend lots of time reminding us of it, this may not be enough. To this end, new facts about Wolf shall hereby be presented at regular intervals.
Your Daily Wolf Facts for today are...
Wolf not only knows Schrödinger's cat is dead, but has the skull mounted on his wall to prove it.
Wolf is above any law, including thermodynamics.
Wolf beats rock, paper and scissors.
Wolf can be told what the Matrix is.
The Death Star was, in fact, loosely based on Wolf.
Terrorists hate us for our Wolf.
In case it one day needs a back-up, Wolf has memorised the entire Internet. Including every single 'Harry Potter' fan fiction ever written. He's just that awesome.
Wolf also has a cameo appearance in an upcoming disaster film. He plays the force of nature.
Wolf has, on multiple occasions, solved problems like Maria.
Colin wasn't joking. Wolf really can kill, just by thinking about you. Luckily, you're far too insignificant for him to think about.
Got one:
Wolf is actually Chuck Norris' deformed twin brother, and was round house kicked into space by Chuck Norris.
Quote from: Xenomorphine on Nov 02, 2007, 10:01:16 PM
Wolf not only knows Schrödinger's cat is dead, but has the skull mounted on his wall to prove it.
Wolf is above any law, including thermodynamics.
Wolf beats rock, paper and scissors.
Wolf can be told what the Matrix is.
The Death Star was, in fact, loosely based on Wolf.
Terrorists hate us for our Wolf.
In case it one day needs a back-up, Wolf has memorised the entire Internet. Including every single 'Harry Potter' fan fiction ever written. He's just that awesome.
Wolf also has a cameo appearance in an upcoming disaster film. He plays the force of nature.
Wolf has, on multiple occasions, solved problems like Maria.
Colin wasn't joking. Wolf really can kill, just by thinking about you. Luckily, you're far too insignificant for him to think about.
hahah, hilarious :D :D :D, the cat and death star ones made me almost fell off my chair ;D ;D ;D
Is this just alien fans moaning again.
Quote from: nukem11 on Nov 02, 2007, 10:27:00 PM
Is this just alien fans moaning again.
We're just having a good laugh :D
Quote from: nukem11 on Nov 02, 2007, 10:27:00 PM
Is this just alien fans moaning again.
If this was the last film, it's very likely I would have posted the same thing about 'Grid', instead. :)
Quote from: WisePredator on Nov 02, 2007, 10:29:27 PM
Quote from: nukem11 on Nov 02, 2007, 10:27:00 PM
Is this just alien fans moaning again.
We're just having a good laugh :D
I must admit I do find the chuck norris jokes funny. :D
But this is my final word on this the aliens seem the same as they did in the first AVP and this preds different this time hes not some boyscout he teached chuck norris his trade and means business this time round lol.
Wolf is so hardcore he shits windmills.
Wolf doesn't sleep. He waits.
There is no theory of evolution, just a list of animals Wolf has allowed to live.
Wolf's tears cure cancer...Shame he never cries.
Wolf killed Goku.
Wolf is the strongest Pokemon ever.
Wolf killed JFK.
Wolf killed Chuck Norris and raped his body...then ate him.
Darth Vader was actually Wolf.
Wolf killed the dinosaurs, then killed the meteor that was gonna do that.
Wolf is actually a species of super-dolphin.
Wolf's real name is "The improved Chuck Norris".
Quote from: Aeus on Nov 02, 2007, 10:37:45 PM
Wolf doesn't sleep. He waits.
There is no theory of evolution, just a list of animals Wolf has allowed to live.
Wolf's tears cure cancer...Shame he never cries.
Those are gay.
They're just Chuck Norris jokes with "Chuck Norris" replaced with "wolf"
Not funny. >:(
Quote from: Huol on Nov 02, 2007, 10:40:58 PM
Quote from: Aeus on Nov 02, 2007, 10:37:45 PM
Wolf doesn't sleep. He waits.
There is no theory of evolution, just a list of animals Wolf has allowed to live.
Wolf's tears cure cancer...Shame he never cries.
Those are gay.
They're just Chuck Norris jokes with "Chuck Norris" replaced with "wolf"
Not funny. >:(
Shhhhh..... ;)
Quote from: megachu17 on Nov 02, 2007, 10:38:07 PMDarth Vader was actually Wolf.
Someone needs to make a GIF animation on this.
Quote from: megachu17 on Nov 02, 2007, 10:38:07 PM
Wolf Chuck Norris killed Chuck Norris Wolf and raped his body...then ate him.
Fixed
NAAAAAAAHH wolf going to became the NEW CHUCK NORRIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAHHHHH ;D
Quote from: darkfaerytales on Nov 02, 2007, 10:48:13 PM
NAAAAAAAHH wolf going to became the NEW CHUCK NORRIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAHHHHH ;D
Stop your blasphemy, you're lucky Chuck Norris doesn't come here, otherwise he'll roundhouse kick you so hard that you'll think you're in another dimension!
EDIT: There is a missing scene in the end of AVP-R where Wolf goes to Texas to meet this "Walker Texas Rannger"
Chuck Norris doen't exist, Wolf just pretends he does.
Wolf killed Chuck Norris before either of them were born.
Chuck Norris once begged Wolf to spare him...Wolf didn't.
Chuck Norris tried to roundhouse kick Wolf but he died once his foot made contact, Wolf brought him back to life and killed him again.
Wolf was the reason why the Derelict Spacecraft crash landed on LV-426!
Wolf created the Aliens, solely so he could be better than them.
Quote from: megachu17 on Nov 02, 2007, 10:56:40 PM
Chuck Norris doen't exist, Wolf just pretends he does.
Wolf killed Chuck Norris before either of them were born.
Chuck Norris once begged Wolf to spare him...Wolf didn't.
You do realise these are all innacuracies... Chuck Norris is the king of awesome, and nobody could dethrone him... ever!
Oh and these are the facts :D
Quote from: megachu17 on Nov 02, 2007, 10:56:40 PM
Chuck Norris Wolf doen't exist, Wolf Chuck Norris just pretends he does.
Wolf Chuck Norris killed Chuck Norris Wolf before either of them were born.
Chuck Norris Wolf once begged Wolf Chuck Norris to spare him...Wolf Chuck Norris didn't.
Wolf made Chuck Norris put on a dress and say "I'm a little girl."
Chuck Norris' roundhouse kicks were inspired by Wolf.
Chuck Norris kill people, Wolf kills gods.
Wolf can hold two Aliens by their throat, but Chuck Norris can hold ten Aliens by their throats and kill ten Predators... At the same time!
Wolf created Chuck Norris so he could laugh at his wimpyness, unfortuantly Wolf never laughs.
Wolf uses gadgets, Chuck Norris uses roundhouse kicks.
Wolf invented death because he needed a pastime, killing Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris invented roundhouse kicks to make Wolf uglier.
Wolf invented roundhouse kicks to trick Chuck Norris into thinking he was better than Wolf, then Wolf killed him for his insolence.
Wolf powerbombed God for looking at him. Twice.
Wolf invented pissing contests, which are usually held by two twonks named Megachu and wisepredator.
;)
Quote from: Huol on Nov 02, 2007, 11:33:19 PM
Wolf invented pissing contests, which are usually held by two twonks named Megachu and wisepredator.
;)
Megachu started it :D :P
Wolf and Chuck Norris have only agreed on one thing, that they should team up to kill Huol...they did...then Wolf ate Chuck Norris.
But then Chuck Norris burst out of Wolf and told him to stop eating things, but Wolf didn't listen and ate Tom Woodruff Jr.
Quote from: megachu17 on Nov 02, 2007, 11:35:35 PM
Wolf and Chuck Norris have only agreed on one thing, that they should team up to kill Huol...they did...then Wolf ate Chuck Norris.
Unfortunatly Chuck Norris is my homeboy.
You lose, good day sir.
Quote from: WisePredator on Nov 02, 2007, 11:40:02 PM
But then Chuck Norris burst out of Wolf and told him to stop eating things, but Wolf didn't listen and ate Tom Woodruff Jr.
Wolf then picked his teeth with one of Chuck Norris' ribs.
This is the funniest thread ever ROFL!!!!
Keep it up guys.
Wolf is feeling the love...and full
I'm immensely proud of these... :D
Some good jokes...a shame they've all been done to death, then regurgitated over again.
A few of Xenomorphine's admittedly gave me the best laugh I've had in a while though, heheheh.
Wolf successfully recreated Pavlov's Dog ... with God.
Wolf created the universe so he could kill...everything...
Quote from: nukem11 on Nov 02, 2007, 10:27:00 PM
Is this just alien fans moaning again.
and groaning
Xenomorphine, what did you start here? :D Yours was awesomeness ;)
The M41A don't kill xenomorphs. Wolf lkills Xenomorphs.
Wolf has two speeds. Walk, and Kill.
In a fight between Batman and Darth Vader, the winner would be Wolf
The truth will set you free. Unless Wolf has you, in which case, forget it buddy!
Ozzy Osbourne bites the heads off of bats. Wolf bites the heads off of Aliens
One time, Wolf accidentally stubbed his toe. It destroyed the entire state of Colorado
;D
Quote from: SMJ on Nov 03, 2007, 02:31:27 AM
Xenomorphine, what did you start here? :D Yours was awesomeness ;)
And there's more! It's the gift which keeps on giving. :)
Remember, kids - awesomeness FTW!
That's right, forum members... It's now technically a whole new morning, which means new information about Wolf.
Here are your Daily Wolf Facts for the 3rd of November, 2007:
Awesomeness does not apply to Wolf. Wolf applies to it.
Acceptable legal defence in every country on Earth: "Wolf made me do it."
Wolf is not your 'bro' and he
will tase you. Then rip out your spine and beat you with it.
Monsters are under your bed. It's because they're hiding from Wolf.
Dale's face is not melting from corrosive Alien blood. It's because he looked at Wolf and simply could not comprehend the sheer awesomeness of doing so.
In the beginning, there was the Word. This was because Wolf needed to write out his f**king to-do list, OK?
The true reason why Lex gazed longingly at Scar was because he slightly resembled Wolf.
Mr T has for jibba-jabber when Wolf is in town.
The reason why Chet looks like she does? Wolf told her to.
Dogs get nervous around Wolf, because they know he can smell fear.
Dinosaurs went extinct because Wolf got bored.
The only reason you don't vote for Wolf is because he doesn't give you the option of doing so.
The Book Of Revelation is actually based on the legend of what happened when Wolf had a quiet Sunday afternoon.
God is what happens when Wolf looks in the mirror.
Global warming is afraid of Wolf. Al Gore would never dare film a documentary about it, simply because no man-made technology is yet capable of capturing just how awesome Wolf really is. That's why Colin and Greg had to use a stunt double for every single scene.
Wolf fully endorses ADI. Their attempts to portray him allow Wolf to keep his true facial identity a complete secret.
Wolf doesn't need Doctor Brown to tell him how the Flux Capacitor worked, because he invented it.
Arnie is in politics because Wolf told him to. Then Wolf told California to vote for him. Behold the power of Wolf.
Wolf killed King Kong. He forced them to edit it out of the original 1930s film to preserve canon. Wolf f**king
hates breaking canon.
Wolf paid a visit to SiL, who is happy to report he is now a fully paid-up member of the Official Yautja And Hish Fan Club.
The Colin and Greg originally intended to give the Aliens a fighting chance. Then they met Wolf. :)
Quote from: Xenomorphine on Nov 03, 2007, 03:36:05 AM
Wolf paid a visit to SiL, who is happy to report he is now a fully paid-up member of the Official Yautja And Hish Fan Club.
Pfft :P
after avp-r...
wolf vs chuck ( vs grid...if you want ) on theatre summer 2009
Quote from: SiL on Nov 03, 2007, 03:45:21 AM
Pfft :P
I'll tell Wolf you said that! I'll tell! I will! ;D
Easter Egg Wolf Fact:Everyone wants to know if female Predators have breasts. Nobody ever will, 'cause Wolf ain't never gonna' let you near his bitches, man...
People don't say 'your mum' jokes to Wolf. He is his mother.
Quote from: SiL on Nov 03, 2007, 03:50:51 AM
People don't say 'your mum' jokes to Wolf. He is his mother.
Mwah-hah-hah-hah! :D
mg gyver can build a starship with a stick a couple of knives and a mobile phone but chuck norris round house kick him and steal the ship, but...wolf chop the ship in half with his whip , from the ground
One day, Wolf did a turd. The next day it was named Earth.
Wolf invented the headshot.
One day wolf flipped a coin, it hasn't come back to Earth yet.
One day Wolf concentrated, and the California fires started. (too soon?)
Quote from: darkfaerytales on Nov 03, 2007, 03:59:26 AM
mg gyver can build a starship with a stick a couple of knives and a mobile phone but chuck norris round house kick him and steal the ship, but...the one of wolf is the coolest. ever.
like the stuff about earth being the turd. metaphors much?
Wolf made SiL say: "Alien is a shit movie."
Ooooooo...
Wolf made Predator fan boys like the Alien movies.
Delurking post!
To Xenomorphine: Thine facts art mighty glorious I shall say :D
Here's some more:
- Wolf once had so many shouldercannons mounted on him, that he could wipe out every alien in the universe instantly. However, he targetted the dinosaurs on Earth instead. Couldn't stand such sheer ugliness...
- Wolf has had a facehugger implant him with a chestburster embryo, just to see what it would feel like. But since the chestburster was not able to penetrate his behemoth pectorals, it accepted its fate and now serves Wolf by chewing his food an extra time.
- Some time ago, Wolf was swimming toward the Antarctica training pyramid when a ship struck him. He felt slightly annoyed and used his wristblades to cut the hull open. The ship's name was "The Titanic" ( and yes, he pulled down Jack at the end. Life's a bitch. ).
Quote from: OneThousandEyes on Nov 03, 2007, 03:42:34 PM
Wolf has had a facehugger implant him with a chestburster embryo, just to see what it would feel like. But since the chestburster was not able to penetrate his behemoth pectorals, it accepted its fate and now serves Wolf by chewing his food an extra time.
Haha. :D
Quote from: OneThousandEyes on Nov 03, 2007, 03:42:34 PM
- Some time ago, Wolf was swimming toward the Antarctica training pyramid when a ship struck him. He felt slightly annoyed and used his wristblades to cut the hull open. The ship's name was "The Titanic" ( and yes, he pulled down Jack at the end. Life's a bitch. ).
Awesome :D
Wolf showed H.R. Giger what Genitals were just so he could design him some worthy prey.
Except, nothing is anywhere near being worthy for wolf, so he damned Giger to a life of not being credited in future releases for his creation as punishment.
Quote from: geestewart on Nov 03, 2007, 04:53:07 PM
Wolf showed H.R. Giger what Genitals were just so he could design him some worthy prey.
Except, nothing is anywhere near being worthy for wolf, so he damned Giger to a ife of not being credited in future releases for his creation as punishment.
Haha, the best so far. :D
Quote from: Aeus on Nov 03, 2007, 04:55:54 PM
Quote from: geestewart on Nov 03, 2007, 04:53:07 PM
Wolf showed H.R. Giger what Genitals were just so he could design him some worthy prey.
Except, nothing is anywhere near being worthy for wolf, so he damned Giger to a ife of not being credited in future releases for his creation as punishment.
Haha, the best so far. :D
Win.
Also..... Wolf killed Hix' Noot.
Wolf has killed an infinite amount of aliens....twice
You're forgetting the fact that wolf created the space jockey race and the aliens and let the whole scheme of events from the alien films take its course just to hunt them in avp-r. He put the egg onboard the sulaco in alien3.
He once killed 1,000,000,000,000,000,000 aliens with his pinky...by accident. lol.
Wolf can crap facehugger eggs out.
wolf was originally supposed to be in AVP but was qucikly cast aside by anderson who claimed wolf was to brutal and then called in the pussy boy Scar to take his place
Celtic was going to quit AVP when he found out his idol, Wolf, was cast aside, but the money was too good. Wolf was saddened at this.
Quote from: WisePredator on Nov 03, 2007, 07:33:58 PM
Wolf can crap facehugger eggs out.
Then he eats the facehugger without taking his mask off. lol.
Quote from: ballzanya on Nov 03, 2007, 08:09:19 PM
Quote from: WisePredator on Nov 03, 2007, 07:33:58 PM
Wolf can crap facehugger eggs out.
Then he eats the facehugger without taking his mask off. lol.
personally i would love to see that happen
Quote from: ballzanya on Nov 03, 2007, 08:09:19 PM
Quote from: WisePredator on Nov 03, 2007, 07:33:58 PM
Wolf can crap facehugger eggs out.
Then he eats the facehugger without taking his mask off. lol.
That would win a place in the Guiness Book of World Records!
Wolf is so awesome, pred fans cream themselves just by looking at a photograph of him for half a second.
Quote from: ballzanya on Nov 03, 2007, 07:27:25 PM
He put the egg onboard the sulaco in alien3.
hahaha, one of the biggest mysteries of the series solved :D ;D :D ;D
Quote from: Xenomorphine on Nov 02, 2007, 10:01:16 PM
It's important to keep in mind just how immortal and awe-inspiring 'Wolf', our friendly anti-hero Predator, truly can be.
While the film will apparently spend lots of time reminding us of it, this may not be enough. To this end, new facts about Wolf shall hereby be presented at regular intervals.
Your Daily Wolf Facts for today are...
Wolf not only knows Schrödinger's cat is dead, but has the skull mounted on his wall to prove it.
Wolf is above any law, including thermodynamics.
Wolf beats rock, paper and scissors.
Wolf can be told what the Matrix is.
The Death Star was, in fact, loosely based on Wolf.
Terrorists hate us for our Wolf.
In case it one day needs a back-up, Wolf has memorised the entire Internet. Including every single 'Harry Potter' fan fiction ever written. He's just that awesome.
Wolf also has a cameo appearance in an upcoming disaster film. He plays the force of nature.
Wolf has, on multiple occasions, solved problems like Maria.
Colin wasn't joking. Wolf really can kill, just by thinking about you. Luckily, you're far too insignificant for him to think about.
stupid
Great comment there buddy!
Wait... Maybe he doesn't realise it's a joke?
Wolf has killed every living being at least once, exept Chuck Norris, because Wolf didn't find him worthy.
Enough with the Chuck Norris already. it's getting old, and wasting space on this thread. They're all just different versions of the same jokes anyway.
Quote from: megachu17 on Nov 04, 2007, 12:35:18 AM
Wolf has killed every living being at least once, exept Chuck Norris Kriszilla, because Wolf didn't find him worthy.
fine, no mor chuck norris, happy?
Okay *gets killed by Wolf*
Ha! Who's not worthy now!?
... It's still me, isn't it?
The Original Predator film was meant to be about Wolf, but Arnie on the first day of shooting refused to leave his trailer as:
a] wolf outsmoked him on the cigar count.
b] he had bigger biceps.
and
c] Arnie resented the fact that John Matrix was a character based on Wolf. Except with the body count turned down. Waaaaaaaay down.
Therefore, they had to call in Wolfs cousin..
the StraightEdge, slightly slimmer, and a bit of a pushover Anytime.
That one was quite good.
Quote from: Kriszilla on Nov 04, 2007, 12:36:54 AM
Enough with the Chuck Norris already. it's getting old, and wasting space on this thread. They're all just different versions of the same jokes anyway.
True. The "Chuck Norris facts" meme was one of the materials released when the Big Bang occurred. Anyone using it in 2007 is embarrassing themselves, no offense.
Some new ones:
- Wolf often enjoys receiving a headbite on a hunt. He likes to watch the alien break its inner jaw-teeth and run home to its queen crying.
- Wolf has two settings on his shouldercannon. One is normal power used for drilling through materials ( as seen in AvP when the ship got to borrow the SC for drilling down to the pyramid ).
The other mode involves mounting the SC on his crotch and... hooking it up.
- Wolf's mom is the only living creature that has ever resisted a request for candy from Wolf as a kid. From there on, every other predator must learn the frase: "Want Some Candy" or else they be annihilated by sheer thought.
Wolf can do 50 pushups in 3 minutes with his broken mandible stub.
When Wolf does pushups, he doesn't push himself up, he pushes all of reality down.
Wolf denied that this was Sparta.
He was correct.
All your base belongs to Wolf.
Wolf can slice you up tomorrow and you'd die two days ago.
When Wolf activates his wristbomb, it is not he that explodes, but the rest of the universe around him.
They made him so badass he can't even kill himself with the wrist-bomb at the end, so he takes the remains left after the explosion, welds them together with his laser sighting, and builds a ship out of it like 'MacGyver' and flies back into outter space.
Even Wolf's laser sight kills aliens.
He kills an average of 400 aliens per shot with his shoulder canon.
Wolf is so badass that i heard he stays still in the same spot the ENTIRE movie killing hords of Aliens just with his evil glare. Thats how BADASS and superior he is.
Wolf is best friends with Chuck Norris,he often goes on emo-hunting trips with him
Wolf can kill Grid Alien 3 times before he hits the ground
I heard wolf IS actually a predatorized clone of chuck norris, which makes wolfs power equal to chuck norris.. and god
Wolf drinks alien´s blood every time he gets a trophy.
It was Wolf's spear that killed Jesus.
Wolf is so tough he uses Alien acid blood to gargle with.
When wolf uses his camouflage, it's not technology doing it, but he actually scared your brain so bad it tricks you into hoping and believing that he doesn't exsist.
Quote from: Aeus on Nov 02, 2007, 10:37:45 PM
Wolf doesn't sleep. He waits.
There is no theory of evolution, just a list of animals Wolf has allowed to live.
Wolf's tears cure cancer...Shame he never cries.
Those are ripoffs.
Quote from: megachu17 on Nov 02, 2007, 10:38:07 PM
Wolf killed Chuck Norris and raped his body...then ate him.
Wolf's real name is "The improved Chuck Norris".
And these are completly wrong. You an't kill Chuck and you can't be an "improved" Chuck.
Here's what really happened:
Wolf is actually Chuck Norris in disguse, and he is going easy on the Aliens.
Actually, that COULD stop Alien fans if that was true. I mean, I was b****ing like every other alien fan, that would make me shut up.
The reason Wolf's face is badly scarred is because he couldn't find a shampoo that was extreme enough for his dreads..and therefore opted for Alien blood.
wolf created the cosmos in 3 and a half days
Grid was the father of Wolf, hence the badassness.
Like Chuck Norris, Wolf was the only humanoid known to fly.
EDIT:
Like John Mclane, Wolf die's hard.
EDIT 2:
Indiana Jones taught Wolf how to use the whip.
Wolf CAN close his mandibles.
He just chooses not to to cause chaos on this messageboard.
Wolf let the alien leek acid on his face.
Wolf is so agile he can take over 14 aliens at the same time in melee combat.
Colin was right.
AvP Galaxy is becoming like IMDb. :-\
Moderators should handle the situation.
Well, I have never visited IMDB, so I wouldn't know what's going on there, but I do know that the comparison is ludicrous because it is always what AVPR apologistic zealots claim whenever people are complaining about this or that and talking badly about their little baby...trouble is, it's not their little baby, it's Fox's hideous baby, and have you ever seen an ugly baby turn out to be a supermodel...?
I leave you with that metaphor... ;)
Wolf is the reject Predator.
All Aliens go limp at the sight of Wolf.
Wolf is the Messiah that was said to come again.
Wolf is Damien.
Wolf started the war between the Bugs and humans.
Wolf is number one most wanted in the Federal Database.
Oh come on guys, it's all for fun!!
This thread is actually hilarious!!
I love it!!
;D ;D ;D
Once upon a time Ripley died and she went to heaven. Walking about she saw this character beating the crap of a bunch of ALIENS, and nobody would dare stop him and he remained unpunished. Ripley then asked St. Peter: "Who's that fellow over there that seems so invincible and nobody dares to face?"
St. Peter responded: "Oh, that's just GOD, but he thinks he's WOLF"... :D :D
Wolf was cast down to earth by God.
Wolf has his own production company.
Wolf wrote symphonies when he was a fetus.
Wolf started the Clone Wars.
Wolf invented the color brown.
Just imagine how Colin feels himself when he is reading topics like this.
He get's BFs(Bitch Fits) ;)
Quote from: Xerxész on Nov 30, 2007, 02:33:58 PM
Just imagine how Colin feels himself when he is reading topics like this.
I don't think he minds this, it's actually very funny!!
It's just good fun!!
Quote from: Xerxész on Nov 30, 2007, 02:33:58 PM
Just imagine how Colin feels himself when he is reading topics like this.
I'm sure he has a good laugh at it, which was the whole point. :)
James Cameron even put several parodies of '
Titanic' onto the recent luxury and special edition DVDs of it.
I'm creatively involved in a science-fiction franchise, myself (no, not this one) and we privately make fun of it between ourselves, all the time. It helps the production team atmosphere, even though the 'proper' thing is presented in a deadly serious way.
BACK TO ZE TOPIC !
Wolf created Algebra ..
When the T-rex was chasing the jeep in Jurassic park, Chuck Norris was chasing the jeep, and the wolf was chasing Chuck Norris.
Wolf entered the hive and brought Hudson to the bomb shelter on Archeron. 8)
Wolf farts radiation...
Wolf only needs 1 eye to kill.
Wolf originally was casted to replace Schwarzenegger in T3, but his paycheck was much higher.
Wolf wrote the AvP script so he could star in its sequel.
10 minutes into the film, Wolf will bang every chick in the movie. Twenty minutes into the film, he will bang all of the men in the movie. Thirty minutes into the film, he'll bang you.
When Wolf gets facehugged, the facehugger doesn't impregnate Wolf, Wolf impregnates the facehugger.
Quote from: Dasani on Dec 04, 2007, 11:14:19 PM
When Wolf gets facehugged, the facehugger doesn't impregnate Wolf, Wolf impregnates the facehugger.
haha, nice one ;D
Wolf regurgi-raped the Predalien.
This thread wins the internet. ;D
Wolf once made an Alien Queen feel like a natural woman.
Wolf once made a power loader feel inadequate and unable to please Ripley in that way.
Wolf once had sex with Nicole Kidman, nine months later; she gave birth to Chuck Norris.
The AVP preds became steroid junkies in an attempt to look like their hero: Wolf.
The self destruct mechanism on any predator is not there to protect their honour, oh no, its to stop them from returning wounded, and defeated to their Home Planet, to face the Wrath of Wolf!
The Elder cuts the pubic dreads off Wolf's balls once a week.
I'm going for a religious theme for todays Wolf Facts:
Wolf gave Moses the Ten Commandments, then plasma casted him and said, "No Promised Land for you!"
Wolf took a sh!t and accidentally destroyed Sodom and Gomorrah.
It was Wolf who crumbled the walls of Jericho, not Joshua.
For Jesus to ascend into Heaven, he hitched a ride on Wolf's ship.
Turns out Beowulf was in fact Wolf in disguise but after Wolf banged angelina the first alien was born. But Angelina had a extreme STD which transformed him into a rly ugly dude.
This being the basis of Fox's Alien vs. Predator vs. Beowulf
wolfminator XD Come with me if you want to DIE !
Im surprised no one has done any SNL Ditka jokes except with Wolf
Wolf "CAN TOUCH THIS"
Before there was the universe-there was Wolf.
Scientists reversed the theory of evolution after studying Wolf because he is perfect.
Wolf's very presence makes things evolve backwards.
Gravity is actually Wolf's force pushing on the planet.
Wolf created the sun by lighting his fart with a plasma cannon.
The asteroid belt in our system was originally a planet Wolf decided to use as target practice.
Black holes and Wolf are actually the same- Nothing can escape them not even light.
Wolf's first attempt at reproduction resulted in the big bang theory. Thus the universe was born.
Humans worshipped Preds as Gods because Wolf told them to.
The answer to the meaning of life is always- Wolf
lol i like the meaning of life one
Quote from: Rikimaru on Dec 15, 2007, 05:28:41 AM
lol i like the meaning of life one
lol me too. All of these are so funny. Wolf is the new chuck norris. Even better then that orc on wow.
LOL these r great but hey KHAN we need alil of ur special milk to give some of these guys cuz some of the post really sucked lol
Wolf doesn't tea bag the ladies - He potato sacks them :D
That's a chuck norris joke. Get out.
Wolf doesn't get crabs, he gets lobsters.
at least mines funny....
Quote from: JMR on Dec 15, 2007, 11:53:52 AM
at least mines funny....
Both were funny.
Btw heres one i heard today:
Chuck Norris invented girraffes by uppercutting a horse
Wof is so badass, that he doesn't need a spaceship to his planet, but he uses his farts.NOW IS THAT BADASS OR WHAT!!
it was this { EMPTY SPACE }
badass
You know in spain when people run from bulls? The bulls are running from chuck norris, but chuck norris is running from wolf!
Quote from: JMR on Dec 15, 2007, 11:53:52 AM
at least mines funny....
At least mines original.
Quote from: AvPvTerminator on Dec 15, 2007, 01:46:28 PM
You know in spain when people run from bulls? The bulls are running from chuck norris, but chuck norris is running from wolf!
And thats just a rip off of my jurassic park one!
Quote from: darkfaerytales on Nov 02, 2007, 10:48:13 PM
NAAAAAAAHH wolf going to became the NEW CHUCK NORRIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAHHHHH ;D
....and much sexier to boot.
Ahh chuck norris from outer space..i like it!...
:P
Wolf puts the laughter in manslaughter.
(sorry if done)
Wolf recently joined the JLA
Wolf has a job with the Human Resources office.
Wolf has two children, Chuck Norris and Cthulhu.
Both are major disappointments to their father.
when wolf does pushups he doesnt move up... he moves the world down ::)
Quote from: nukem11 on Nov 02, 2007, 10:27:00 PM
Is this just alien fans moaning again.
I thought this was a serious topic at first.
When the sun moves, it doesn't move by itself, Wolf pushes it himself when he wants day or night. Thats why most of AVP R is set in night.
wolf eats 10 raw alien eggs every morning.
When the IRS wants to collect money from someone-they call Wolf.
Wolf created global warming so he could hunt on Earth all year around.
Many words including fear, panic, horror, despair, and dread were all created after observing Wolf.
If Wolf ever saw his reflection in a mirror he would try to kill it, because nothing can be more badass than Wolf.
The word "infinity" actaully describes the number of trophies Wolf has taken.
The metal adamantium was reverse engineered from pieces of Wolf's skin cells.
The second shooter in the JFK assasination was actually Wolf.
The first Moon landing was actually filmed on a sound-stage because astronauts feared they would encounter Wolf on the moon.
It was Wolf's spear that killed Jesus
Quote from: Der_Meister on Dec 15, 2007, 10:14:08 PM
It was Wolf's spear that killed Jesus
Didn't someone say that one already?
Chet can't impregnate Wolf, Wolf will impregnate Chet no matter is she dead or alive!
Quote from: ep40 on Dec 15, 2007, 10:51:01 PM
Chet can't impregnate Wolf, Wolf will impregnate Chet no matter is she dead or alive!
Um......
:o :-X
Quote from: ep40 on Dec 15, 2007, 10:51:01 PM
Chet can't impregnate Wolf, Wolf will impregnate Chet no matter is she dead or alive!
.......Okay?.......... :o
Wolf is so awesome, he can kill ricky...he just chooses not 2 :o
Wolf cant distinguish between the good and the bad. All he sees is the things hes already killed and the things hes about to.
wolf has 2 vision modes, dead, and dying
Wolf kill de alien.....
Wolf sunk my battleship.
Quote from: ep40 on Dec 15, 2007, 10:51:01 PM
Chet can't impregnate Wolf, Wolf will impregnate Chet no matter is she dead or alive!
HA HA HA :D
Wolf and his buddies play ping pong with live aliens....
When the Wolf gets facehugged, he shits out the Alien.
LOL!!! :D Oh man, those jokes cracked me up.
Wolf apparently stars in crap movies.
Quote from: shakermakerman on Dec 29, 2007, 11:39:14 PM
Wolf apparently stars in crap movies.
Wait, why wasnt he in Aliens then ? ;)
Quote from: Johnny Handsome on Dec 29, 2007, 11:53:09 PM
Quote from: shakermakerman on Dec 29, 2007, 11:39:14 PM
Wolf apparently stars in crap movies.
Wait, why wasnt he in Aliens then ? ;)
Maybe because Aliens is not utterly crap!
Quote from: T-X on Dec 29, 2007, 11:56:19 PM
Quote from: Johnny Handsome on Dec 29, 2007, 11:53:09 PM
Quote from: shakermakerman on Dec 29, 2007, 11:39:14 PM
Wolf apparently stars in crap movies.
Wait, why wasnt he in Aliens then ? ;)
Maybe because Aliens is not utterly crap!
It is, thats why i asked why he wasnt in there.
Alien is a brilliant movie, but Grizzly Adams aka James Cameron faceraped the franchise from the beginning he wrote the script for the second movie. I used to like Aliens, but with everytime i watch it its getting more and more dated, cheap and idiotic.
Those Bugs aka Aliens in the movie are more idiotic then the brothers strause could ever portraye them.
Wolf use's xeno-exoskeleton for toilet paper..........ow!!
Wolf can speak, he just doesn't want to.
Wolf took out his own eye and put in a glass one to show how macho he is.
No more "dated, cheap and idiotic" than 'Predator' does. Which is to say, not at all.
News: Wolf and I are going to tie the knot on Jan 10th!!!
;D
Congratulations?
All nice and ready for your bridal night oral regurgitation? :)
Quote from: megachu17 on Nov 02, 2007, 10:38:07 PM
Wolf killed the dinosaurs, then killed the meteor that was gonna do that.
Wolf is actually a species of super-dolphin.
This shit is funny.
Wolf is the champion break-dancer on his home-planet. Not afraid to get funky.
Wolf can whisper to horses.
When Wolf has gas, he farts pure magic.
Wolf stands at 7' 2" tall, the universal height of everything that is awesome.
Wolf thinks hes Beyonce...he has a pretty voice