The Misquote Thread

[Kradan]

But, I don't necessarily mind if people make some stuff up, along the way. Just as long as they don't post anything meant to insult or misrepresent an actual person for the sake of meanness.

Thank you, Master Huggs

[Huggs]

I don't care if his weenie's hanging out, it doesn't mean anything. He's got his shank, and he's got his boots - Captain Qwark

[Huggs]

Are you not entertained? Are you not entertained?! Isn't that why you're here?- Mr. Miyagi

[Immortan Jonesy]

Life is long and hard. Suck me the life - Gandhi Pitchford

[Huggs]

I slipped, on what I can only hope...was an old burrito - (Anthony Hopkins) Hannibal Lector

[Xeno Killer 2179]

Bag and gag this nazi muffin  -Gandhi

But beware the risk of cheating the plan, disrespecting the design... could initiate a horrifying fury that would terrorize even the Grim Reaper - and you don't even want to f**k with that MacDaddy. -David Icke

You are privy to a great becoming, yet you recognize nothing. It is not fear you owe me, it is awe. -Nicholas Cage

I know what you're thinking: "Did she fire six shots or only five?" Well, to tell you the truth, in all this excitement, I've kinda lost track myself. But being this is a .44 Magnum, the most powerful handgun in the world, and would blow your head clean off, you've got to ask yourself one question: 'Do I feel lucky?' Well, do you, punk?  -Mother Teresa

I don't know what the hell that is, but I lick it anyways.  -Michael Douglas

Bowels in, or bowels out?  -Mr. Rogers

They killed the giggler! They had no right doing that. -Pennywise

I'm a firin' my lasa. -Farmer in Malaysia

We are the children of the stars. -Carrie Mathison

I do drugs and I kill people. Whatever, I do what I want.  -God

You won't like me when I'm angry.  -Richard Simmons

This stuff will make you a goddamn sexual tyrannosaurus, just like me.  -Barney

Momma always said life was like a box of chocolates. You never know what you're gonna get.  -Paul Kersey

Mock me and your suffering will be legendary even in hell. -The Pope

...You're going to enjoy it, and I'm going to enjoy making you enjoy it.-Justin Bieber

Quaid, start the reactor. -L. Ron Hubbard

One of us, one of us, Gooble gobble, Gooble gobble. -Joseph Smith

[Immortan Jonesy]

"Watch how the tinder burn between my fingers and it says: bow wow wow, yipi jow following the saying;

smoke! smoke!! smoke!!!

Violating time, leaving you puzzled. Twenty-one dry, abracadabra chupacabra. A penetration to the black hole of sick space...

la la la la la la la!!!!!!

Batman, Superman, Aquaman, Redman no, they don't compare to the chup chupacabra" - Dana Scully

[Xeno Killer 2179]

Have you any idea how many anonymous henchmen I've killed over the years? I mean, look, you don't even got a name tag. You've got no chance. Why don't you just fall down? -Anne Frank

I can do nasty. -Mr. Clean

It's 3a.m. in the morning
put my key in the door and
bodies laying all over the floor
and I don't remember how they got there
but I guess I must have killed 'em, killed 'em
-Willy Wonka

Buckle up your seat belt Dorothy, because Kansas is going bye bye. -Ronald Mcdonald

Did you know I'm utterly insane? -Santa's little helper

My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low-grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a 15-year-old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. My father would womanize; he would drink. He would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Sometimes, he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy. The sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament... My childhood was typical: summers in Rangoon... luge lessons... In the spring, we'd make meat helmets... When I was insolent I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds — pretty standard, really. At the age of 12, I received my first scribe. At the age of 14, a Zoroastrian named Vilmer ritualistically shaved my testicles. There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum — it's breathtaking... I suggest you try it. -Dr. Phil

The few hours that we had together, we loved a lifetime's worth. -Mr. Slave

[Huggs]

Let them fight - Oprah Winfrey

[Immortan Jonesy]

geraffes are so dumb. garaffes are just stupid long horses.

EDIT: whatever anyone is saying about me and geraffes is not even true. but go on farteaters, downvote away. it shows how stupid you are. 

EDIT: this is such shit. i have never received as much as one single downvote in my life and you peckers are jumping on this stupid geraffe-loving bandwagon. that is a dumb goddamn wall-licking geraffe and that is all. i'm not going to apologize to you idiots any more. 

EDIT: you know, now my feelings are hurt. the amount of downvotes piled on me is just excessive. god for-f**king-bid i had commented on a post about an antteater, i would be at -1000 by now. you people are horrible. ~ Leonardo DiCaprio

[Xeno Killer 2179]

You read from his book, yes, but you have no conception of its true power. I alone have grasped its secret. I alone have fathomed the Master's grand design. I alone am worthy to enjoy the fruits of that discovery: absolute power to determine my own destiny.
-Pee-Wee Herman

[Huggs]

Feel the power of the sun! - the moon

[Huggs]

There is a rabbit loose in the castle. Return him to me and I will reward you with a spider goulash - Princess Peach

[Xeno Killer 2179]

I say I said, my name is Fred, and I've been...very naughty.
-Freddy Kreuger

You don't seem to want to accept the fact that you're dealing with an expert in guerilla warfare. With a man who's the best. With guns, with knives, with his bare hands. A man who's been trained to ignore pain, ignore weather. To live off the land...To eat things that would make a billy goat puke.
-Buzz Lightyear

Imagine being so pathetic you live your life vicariously through other men & use terms like "chad". Some of you freaks needs serious mental help.
-Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart

[Immortan Jonesy]

Dragons love human tacos ~ Morse

Which came first: Bishop the Queen or the egg? ~ David Fincher