Life of Tajaru

Started by Gangster Predator, Mar 05, 2007, 06:28:48 AM

Author
Life of Tajaru (Read 5,324 times)

Gangster Predator

Gangster Predator

   Deep into the jungle of powerful and honorable creatures lived a little yautja named Tajaru. He was sent into the forest by his family to find dinner for the day to prove he could become a strong warrior.In the misty  jungle Tajaru wondered off.He walked near a crystal green pond that was filled and populated with odd looking fish. He waited quietly as he sat on the rock with a handmade spear in his hand.

"Come on you stupid fish..show yourself!"Tajaru said annoyed.

He folded his arms on his knees and rested his chin on his wrists. He continued to stare at the shining pond. In a instant a fish head came out the water batting its beady pitch black eyes. Tajaru light green eyes brighten as he knew this would be the catch of the day. He slowly lifted the sharp spear and quickly jabbed it through the fish skull. But in amazement the fish tail started to wag for a good 6 seconds and died.

"Finally I caught a fish. Maybe this will prove that I can hunt!"he said in a proud voice.

Tajaru snatched the wet fish off the spear and stuffed him into the bag. When he turned his head and looked at the pond dozens of fish started to pop their heads in and out the water like a whack-a-mole game. They poked their heads in and out the water in a fast pace. Tajaru eyes widened looking confused "I can't catch all these fish!"he said as he kept poking the spear into the water trying to kill some of the fish and catch them. They were too hard to keep a eye on as they quickly disappeared.

"I only have one fish,this isn't going to feed my mother, older sister and my little nephew!"he thought as he walked away from the pond and into the jungle.

"AAARRRGGGHHH!"A huge roar that echoed throughout the forest could be heard. The huge roar startled the little yautja. He put his spear into a clth that was made to carry things on his back and took out his stuufed xenomorph dool that was give to him from his mother. He clutched the doll tight feeling frightened.He slowly lingered towards the noise to investigate.

( This is part 1 of my story)

PART 2 COMING SOON!

scarface

scarface

#1
I like it, i like how you put what the yaujta think, its creative. The only thing i have a beef with is, the fish, i dont know why, jsut me. LOL

Guan

Guan

#2
 ;) not bad, you got a little wrigther in you! something that bothered me when I read it was that the things he thougth, he said out load, for ex:

"Finally I caught a fish. Maybe this will prove that I can hunt!"he said in a proud voice.

You shuld instead have written it like this:

Finally I caught a fish. Maybe this will prove that I can hunt! he thougth proudly.

But other than that it was really good, cant wait for part 2!   8)

Gangster Predator

Gangster Predator

#3
Wow thanks! I'll start part two. Just give me a week and I'll get it together.

AvPGalaxy: About | Contact | Cookie Policy | Manage Cookie Settings | Privacy Policy | Legal Info
Facebook Twitter Instagram YouTube Patreon RSS Feed
Contact: General Queries | Submit News